


Hangover (Saiouma Oneshot)

by Lunanescente



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Angst, Dangan Ronpa Spoilers, Death, Explicit Language, Hangover, Heavy Angst, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Love, M/M, No Fluff, No Smut, referenced a lot tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-28
Updated: 2019-04-28
Packaged: 2020-02-08 18:26:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18628786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunanescente/pseuds/Lunanescente
Summary: Shuichi Saihara wakes up to find bright morning lights and a silent room. He sighs and turns to kiss the most important person to him, only to remember he's not here anymore.





	Hangover (Saiouma Oneshot)

Kokichi Ouma. Such a strange person he was, a liar, very childish- but human. He made mistakes just like everyone else, he made too many jokes and lies for his own good, he could get so obnoxious you could rip out your hair. Kokichi may have been odd, but if someone really got to know him- if he let someone in, they would eventually find that he has problems and pains of his own. He still had feelings, he still was only a teen... He didn't deserve anything that happened to him.

Shuichi Saihara got to know Kokichi, actually learn about him. His view changed completely, and he wanted nothing more than to protect him, care for him, love him. He started as a close friend to Kokichi, always by his side, sticking up for him, defending him, taking care of him... And over the course of around a year, Shuichi fell for him. Crazy; he thought so too. After another year, his feelings still hadn't gone away, and he only grew to care more and more each passing minute for the liar.

Shuichi couldn't do it anymore, he began to feel guilty. He didn't want Kokichi to never know that his best- his only friend had different feelings towards him. That was a lie on it's own, a painful one. He decided he would tell Kokichi his feelings, to get it off his chest, so that Kokichi could be assured their relationship was real, meaningful, and trusting.

Kokichi's expression was inexplicable. A few minutes after hearing a five minute long confession from Shuichi at his own home, he began to cry. Ugly cry. Shuichi can remember the moment so well; how Kokichi fell straight into Shuichi's arms in an embrace, burying his head into his chest, gripping onto his clothes all while silently sobbing.

"I- I thought I was crazy..." Kokichi whispered. "I thought maybe I w-was dumb, that I shouldn't feel that way... B-but Shuichi, I love you too... I love you so much, you're the first and only person to genuinely care... I'm... So thankful, Shuichi. You have no idea," he sniffled. Kokichi only broke for Shuichi, he only showed real emotions around him. "I know I should never have feelings so strongly for someone, especially a friend, but... I couldn't help it!" He giggled. Shuichi rubbed his back and ran his fingers through his long, purple hair, only moving to get a tissue for Kokichi. "I couldn't control my feelings, and they never went away. I was just a coward, s-scared of being rejected and disliked, by the only person who knows a thing about me, the only person who I ever could trust. I... I should have told you, but I was j-just t-too scared."

"Kokichi, I would never hate you, never, I promise... Hell, you could try to kill me or someone else, but I'd still care about you, I'd still have you in my life. The m-most I could ever feel would be disappointment, but you have every reason to get upset, Kokichi. I have no reason to ever stop loving you. Even if I didn't have romantic feelings for you Kokichi," Shuichi pressed a gentle kiss on the smaller boy's forehead. "And you had told me yours, I could never think differently about you, if anything it could prove how all the more human you are... I'd still love you, and if you got me on the romance l-level I might start f-falling for you anyway." It was Shuichi's turn to sniffle a little.

Kokichi giggled very lightly into Shuichi's chest. He lifted his face and rubbed his eyes for a split second before gazing into Shuichi's gold-like eyes. He smiled; a pure smile, a real one. Shuichi leaned down to capture Kokichi's lips in a kiss. They stayed that way for a few minutes before Shuichi set Kokichi down onto his bed, beginning to remove his clothes. Shuichi wasn't sure why he did that, so he began to back away. "I'm s-so sorry-" just when Kokichi grabbed his hand. "Shuichi... Do you... D-do you want to?" Shuichi's face flushed, "I... I never thought a-about it..." He looked into Kokichi's eyes, which seemed to be telling the truth. "I... I wouldn't mind, I just never- I never did this before," he flushed a little and intertwined his fingers with Shuichi's own.

Shuichi blinked. "A-ah... I never di-d that before e-either," he exhaled a shaky breath and inched back closer to Kokichi. The smaller boy grinned lightly and tugged on Shuichi's hand. "If you want it Shuichi... I really want it too," Kokichi blushed. "I wouldn't... Mind anyway." He looked away momentarily and huffed playfully before turning back to look up at the taller boy in front of him. Shuichi laughed quietly and propped himself up on Kokichi's bed.

Shuichi can remember the first time. A little too well.

Present day Shuichi wakes up to those thoughts and memories, bright lights flooding in through the curtains with a strangely silent atmosphere with it. Smiling anyway, he turns to face his fiancé and ask him if he remembers. He... He forgot. His eyes widen and he blinks. Tears and a hollow feeling in the deepest part of him are all that come to him. That's right... He can't believe he already forgot. Kokichi died three weeks ago. The two of them were then in college, a couple years in, deciding to move together and not long after, get married. It had been a normal day, waking up, kissing each other everywhere for a few good long minutes. They got ready, a little slow due to the aches from the previous night's activities, and drove to the university together after getting some toast from the house and a couple of iced teas with it.

"See you at lunch, Shumai!~" Kokichi giggled and skipped the opposite direction when Shuichi and him had to finally part ways. Shuichi hated it, he always wanted to be with Kokichi, but school was for the best of them, as they should get decent jobs if they wanted to raise a family together. Lunch time eventually came, and Shuichi almost got knocked over from behind as a small body pressed against his. "Hey Kichi! How was class?" Kokichi smiled, grabbed the taller boy's hand, and ran with him to the car. "Come on Shumai, hurry!"

"Wh-what's wrong?" Shuichi asked as he hurried into the driver's seat. "Nothing really! I just wanted a quickie, like, kinda bad..." He exhaled and blushed, holding his hands together close to his heart. "I feel like Miu..." He whispered, widening his eyes in what looked like actual shame. Shuichi turned a little red himself and covered his mouth. "I m-mean sure, but, we just did it last night-" Kokichi whined and huffed a little bit. "I know, I- I just... Missed you all day and that new Sex Ed class did not help..." Kokichi blushed even more, pouting for real this time. Shuichi sighed with a laugh. "I guess that means a lot of quickies now then, huh? We're gonna get in trouble for real... Ah, but Kokichi, would that affect anything in gym?" Kokichi started unbuttoning his shirt. "Eh... If it does... Nishishi! At least light, curable aches are better than some issues, around a bunch of judgmental assholes all while wearing tiny ass shorts!"

Shuichi smiled. What he said was quite true though...

They finished up and got lunch to head back for the next class. Kokichi leaned in to kiss Shuichi's lips before he left to go to class. Shuichi smiled, watching him skip off. He loved Kokichi, more than anything, and the new ring on Kokichi's finger, and his, only proved it. "Kichi, I'll wait here for you!" Shuichi called to him, Kokichi's reply just a quick and cute wink. Shuichi was done with class for the day and he wanted to get a little rest before taking Kokichi out to a nice dinner that night. He rarely gets sleep or even any time for intercourse with all the studying and homework he's been having lately, but he was going to make today special for Kokichi. He's always putting up with his late night timings, lots of lights, noise, and especially, no one to hold on to while falling asleep.

It had been a couple months by now most likely that they had a very... Passionate night. Shuichi wanted to treat his fiancé to a fancier dinner and a sweet, yet probably hot, evening. Shuichi blushed and closed his eyes to pass time. Maybe they would even go shopping, they had some money, and they hadn't gone to actually buy more than one item or something other than groceries in quite a long time. Shuichi smiled peacefully, thinking about his beautiful soon-to-be husband and the special night awaiting them.

Shuichi woke up to screaming and running people. He gulped and stepped out the car, looking to his right to see the entire school on fire. He froze, not knowing how to act, what to do, or what to even think. Should he run? Should he see if anyone is inside still? Wait- was Kokichi... Was Kokichi okay? Shuichi's eyes widened and no other thought crossed his mind before he head straight inside to see if he could find anyone, most importantly Kokichi.

"K-Kokichi!" Shuichi yelled out his name, running everywhere he could think of. He already checked the gym, all the safe places, and the bathrooms, and the classrooms. Running through the halls, Shuichi caught onto a voice screaming for help, it wasn't Kokichi though... He ran into the room and caught sight of Kirumi, who was struggling to get out of the bathroom, the door blocked by some pipes and bars. From the other side of the room, he saw Angie trying to free her leg from under a large bar by the hydraulic press. Shuichi didn't have much time so he went for the closest option and started removing the metal blocking the door.

"Kirumi, run!" Shuichi urged when it was clear and saw in his peripheral vision Kokichi, helping Angie get out from the pipe. Angie pulled her foot as hard as she could and beckoned to two to follow as she dashed quickly out of the room. Kokichi turned to look at Shuichi and exhaled heavily. "Sh-Shuichi, you're o-okay..." Shuichi tried to run as fast as his legs would allow him to and the interior crumbled above them. Kokichi crawled through the hydraulic press to get out from the other side but everything collapsed before he could do anything else. Kokichi made eye contact with Shuichi and the press slammed shut.

Shuichi... Couldn't breathe... Surely this was... This wasn't real... He fell and placed his hand on the press. He looked down and blood, thick blood was seeping out, spilling down the corners. "N-no... No, no, no no no no... No..." Shuichi's heart exploded and tears began leaving his eyes immediately. "No... Kokich- Kokichi," he gulped and tried to lift the press. "F-fuck... Kokichi, no, Kokichi..." He gasped for air and scrambled to lift the press. Shuichi wanted to know... If that really happened, so he wanted to see the body, But if it was real...

Shuichi gasped and tears streamed down his face. Kokichi was gone, he was actually gone. Shuichi grabbed a wine bottle from the refrigerator and glanced down at the ring still on his finger. He wasn't going to remove it... No part of him could, or even wanted to for that matter. Shuichi consumed some wine and hit his head on the kitchen counter. "I- fuck, I c-could have saved you, Kokichi... It could have b-been Angie, it could h-have been m-me, or a-anyone else, but it was y-you, Kichi... Why..?" Shuichi's heart burned so badly and he could only collapse on the tile floor, with the wine bottle in his hand. He drank the rest of it as quickly as he could and shattered it on the ground.

"This was your h-home too... This was our life... T-together, it wasn't supposed to be j-just me," Shuichi buried his head into his knees and gripped the broken glass, piercing his hand repeatedly. "It wasn't supposed t-to be only him or o-only me, it was meant to be the both of us. Kokichi, we were supposed to get m-m-married and have a f-family, we were supposed to go to so many dinners a-and parties. You and I were going to spend the rest of our l-lives by each other's s-side... Kokichi, why did you have to die..?" Shuichi couldn't think anymore, he could hardly breathe. He stood and grabbed a bottle of pills. He just wanted to stop thinking. He wanted to stop feeling this horrible, horrible feeling. Nothing would be better than whatever hell the death of his loved one had brought him. 

"K-Kichi... I miss you s-so so much," the boy swallowed the pills and scrambled to get his phone, looking for pictures. He needed to see him, even if it was only a picture. He found so many photos of Kokichi, and Kokichi with him. He found one of Kokichi hugging a cat. Shuichi trembled and bit his lip. He found a few videos. His shoulders began to shake as he watched a few of them.

"Shumai! Shumai! Shu, come on! I'm so excited Shuichi! What should I do? I can't breathe!" They were about to see a concert of one of Kokichi's favorite bands. "Inhale, exhale, Kokichi! It's okay! Just breathe, it's your favorite band you're about to go see... You don't want to faint beforehand do you, Kichi? That wouldn't be good," Shuichi giggled and Kokichi blushed. "Y-yeah, you're probably right... That would be bad," Kokichi smiled and held onto Shuichi's hand. "You okay, Kokichi?"

"Yea, I'm just so happy..." Kokichi almost looked as if he was about to cry. "K-Kichi... Don't cry-" Kokichi laughed. God, how Shuichi fucking misses that laugh, that smile, this personality, those eyes, his soul... He misses his warmth, his love, his lively heart. Everything about him was perfect. Every flaw was just so quirky, it made him Kokichi. Shuichi knew all of them. Like twirling his hair, biting his nails, tilting his head at about everything. Shuichi smiled. Kokichi started crying anyway. "I'm just grateful... I get to do this, with someone who acknowledges me... Someone who cares. That... That's something I never expected. Shuichi, you're something I never expected..." He grinned and pulled himself up on his toes to kiss Shuichi. "Hey... Shumai are you recording??" Kokichi huffed and stuck out his tongue.

Shuichi just wants him back. Shuichi almost wishes it hadn't been him though, because Kokichi would go through this, Kokichi would have to suffer, and he didn't need that. Shuichi started to cry again. They could have both lived. Shuichi pulled up another video and gazed at Kokichi's perfect face. That was... No more. Not even his... His body. All of him was gone.

"Shuichi, quit recording all the time!" They were engaged in this video, so this was fairly recent he realized. "No thanks, Kichi, I wanna record as much as I can so that I can always see you and remember all the moments we share together, even when you and I have to part ways. I hate that, but when it happens, I know I have something to look forward to, something to keep on loving." Kokichi smiled. "Shuichi..." His face turned red and he looked up at the sky. The sun was setting, but stars were bright and visible. "Stars are so pretty, huh Shumai?" Shuichi grabbed Kokichi's hand. "Yes, of course they are... Just not as pretty as you." Kokichi sighed. "There Shumai goes again with the pick up lines..." Shuichi laughed and squeezed Kokichi's hand.

Shuichi cried harder. He saw another video... He wanted to watch one more for now. This one was around a week before he died.

Kokichi was half-sleeping on the couch and breathing softly, light from the television creating a pale blue glow on his face. "Kokichi, you want to go upstairs?" Kokichi yawned and nodded. He rubbed his eye and began to stand before Shuichi picked him up bridal style. "Shumai's so romantic..." He cuddled up close to Shuichi's chest as Shuichi easily carried his small body up to their room. Shuichi set him down on their bed and placed a kiss on his cheek.

"Shuichi, can we... M-make love?" Kokichi asked with an undreadable expression. Shuichi blushed and caressed Kokichi's cheek in his hand. "Yeah," he whispered, crawling on top of Kokichi and kissing his lips gently. "I love you, Shuichi... I love you so much," Kokichi traced Shuichi's lips with his thumb. "I love you too, Kokichi. It won't be long now, and we'll be married. Where do you want to go on our honeymoon? If you want to have one," Shuichi asked while placing a kiss on Kokichi's neck and removing his shirt.

Kokichi sighed happily. "How about France? I've always wanted to go to France. I want to see the lights and the perfect... Everything." He giggled. "Everything about France to me is perfect, especially since it's so romantic, and all of those cafes... Ahh, wouldn't that be so wonderful, Shuichi?" Shuichi grinned and unbuttoned Kokichi's pants, tugging them down his legs after taking of his own shirt. "Yeah, France it is then." Shuichi put his forehead against Kokichi's and kissed his lips again.

How stupid. Shuichi couldn't get Kokichi to see France, even though he made a promise that they'd go. Why did he have to die like this? Why did he have to die at all? Why so young? Shuichi let out a shaky breath and watched the rest of he video before scrolling through messages with Kokichi.

Kichi: hiii shumai~~ i miss you!!

Shumai: Hey, Kichi. I miss you too, I'll see you tonight. How does curry sound?

Kichi: great! can't wait!

Shumai: I love you Kokichi, have fun at your club <3

Kichi: will do! love u too Shumai my beloved <33

Shuichi scrolled a little farther down to more recent texts. He'd probably read these over and over throughout the future, probably memorizing them.

Shumai: Hey Kokichi is everything okay? You seemed a little irritated earlier..

Kichi: yea so cum dumpster fucked up my math assignment, she said she needed to check the answers and copy them down, since they were probably right which they were of course...

Kichi: then she was like 'oh cockichi sorry i kinda screwed up your math assignment' it was literally in shreds

Kichi: like what the hell i had to do the entire packet over again, how the fuck do you even shred a math assignment in trying to check and copy answers??

Shuichi: I'll sue her.

Kichi: please

Kichi: that bitch can eat a...

Shuichi: Math assignment.

Kichi: exactly

Kichi: this is one of the reasons i just adore you shumai

Shuichi: Oh, I see. I'll keep that noted. 

Shuichi: Did you get the other one done?

Kichi: ...no??? maybe? yes? two of those answers are lies? u guess which??

Shuichi: Alright show me it later, I'll help you out.

Kichi: shumai thank you

Kichi: praise be to shumai~~~

Shuichi wiped his face to make a path for new tears to form. He looked at the last texts they sent each other.

Shuichi: I feel like I'm going to fail the assessment today... Did you do yours already?

Kichi: yup, i probably failed! but i have faith in you shuichi you are smart!

Shuichi: Kokichi! You're smart too, I know you didn't fail 100% at least...

Kichi: lolol okay maybe

Kichi: but shumai no matter what score you get or whatever happens

Kichi: im here for you okay? i always will be, just know that

Kichi: i love you shuichi, even if something bad happens, ill still be there

Kokichi lied... He wasn't here. Shuichi shakily stood and went to Kokichi's belongings, he had left basically everything in the car, even his phone. He could've saved his life if Shuichi made sure Kokichi had his phone. Shuichi opened a notebook from one of Kokichi's classes. There were lots of doodles and random words all over the corners, with what seems to be English assignments on the main part of the pages. Kokichi had cute handwriting, it wasn't too nice but it wasn't too messy either. It was Kokichi's.

Shuichi wiped his tears and continued looking through the assignments. There was even a page with an actually really good drawing of Shuichi with little hearts and messages all over the paper. Shuichi clutched it close to his chest and tears was all he could see for a moment.

"I miss you Kokichi..." Shuichi grabbed Kokichi's phone and looked at the lock screen. It was of the two of them wearing panda kigurumi's. Shuichi kissed the notebook and slipped it back into his checkered bag, zipping it up carefully, as if it was as delicate as Kokichi. Shuichi grabbed the bag and held it tightly, inhaling Kokichi's scent. Shuichi always loved how Kokichi smelled, even back in high school when he hardly knew him, he liked the smell Kokichi carried with him, it was pleasant and calm, it always could ease Shuichi's nerves. That's what he needed.

He tried to breathe as steadily as he could, but the tears wouldn't stop streaming. He went to get another wine bottle and sat back down afterwards, clutching the black and white backpack and breathing in and out.

"I can't wait to s-see you again Kokichi, s-someday..."

**Author's Note:**

> I might have cried over this? I kinda hate myself for writing this but I need to write more angst anyways-


End file.
